Blog 6. Home

           
             To me, home is such an intriguing concept. Since my parents are pastors, I’ve had to move a couple of times. Our home was never a location or a building. Our houses were always temporary and we would have to move into a new one now and then. With every move, I’ve noticed that I always use the term house initially. Once we settle in, hang our frames, and fill the halls with the smell of good food then my terminology changes. My house then becomes my home. Home is always what was inside those brick walls; my family. My big, loud, happy family filled those houses and made them home. It was always a safe and comforting place that holds so many memories. I never thought that being away from them that I could find another home, but little did I know, my home was there in Valpo too with my friends. I remember how scared I was when I moved away to college. My thoughts were anxious and I had no idea what to expect. When I got there, it was hard to see myself living there since it felt so different from any other experience I’d ever had. I was immediately homesick and was wondering how I would survive months away from home. Despite my snap judgment I soon met my friends, hung a few more familiar things on my dorm wall, and soon enough I went from calling Valpo my school to calling it my home. What I think is the most powerful aspect of the concept of home is that it truly is people-oriented. An isolating and hostile community can make a person retract and feel so uncomfortable, but a welcoming healthy community can have the exact opposite reaction. Home is not a location but rather a physical manifestation of genuine comfort and acceptance. You can become your most genuine self when you feel comfortable enough to let your guard down and experience life without reservations.

 It's really hard not to cringe but I love to see how far we've come.  

            What I find very memorable about my experience as an EYA was how quickly I was able to call this place home. It’s a strange situation because we are only here for eight short weeks but yet I felt like this place has become and will always be a place of growth and realization for me.  Again, it has nothing to do with the actual apartments we lived in or the beautiful views of DC  that we get to see every day, but instead, the people. I remember on the first day of orientation we had to take group photos and feeling like we all looked super awkward (which they did). I remember wondering how we would all become friends in such a short time, but looking back on those pictures I can see how much of a difference seven weeks have made. From the very beginning, we knew that we were all different people from different places but regardless we shared this societal role of an ethnic minority. We shared experiences of confusion, frustration, hardship, and triumphs. With this great understanding, we were able to build a more genuine healthy community where we each had an equal voice. For me, I felt comfortable to openly share and learn from one another. This place became home because it was a safe space where I knew that for once in a very rare occasion I wasn’t the only person of color in the room. This experience has prompted me to think further about what my home should look like and what I want it to be moving forward in my life. I want my home to be a happy, welcoming, diverse place, where all people feel comfortable to be their most authentic selves. I want my home to be a place where people think deeper and grow in their understanding of the world around them. I want my home to be healthy enough so that if difficult situations arise, it will be able to withstand. Home is something that is created within us all, and I’m glad that I can take a piece of DC into my home wherever I go. These people made this place home this summer and I’m forever grateful that I was able to meet their beautiful souls.

With love,
Mariam
7.19.19

National Disability Rights Network